What does it mean to follow Christ?

Jane: Have you ever thought of asking God why He allows such suffering in the world?
John: No.
Jane: Really? Why not?
John: I'm scared to.
Jane: What are you scared of?
John: I'm scared He'll ask me the same question.

The following is one of the most moving testimonies I've heard. Shane Claiborne is a American Christian who's "interned" with Mother Teresa, worked in a leper colony, lived among the homeless in Philadelphia, and was ministering with other Christians in Iraq just as the Shock and Awe campaign started. Hear his story and how he came to answer the tough question: So what about being a believer in Christ, what does it mean to become a follower of Christ? Its not a short video, so set aside some time for this one.

I personally need to discover some "Calcuttas" of the world. I'll be picking up Claiborne's book The Irresistible Revolution soon (also available at Chapters/Amazon), and will post up a book review.

Read More
The Simply Way - Shane's 'church' formed with some friends
Other Videos - Some other YouTube videos of Shane Claiborne

Click to continue reading...

Bending Over the Abyss

Solitude: the fine art of intentionally doing nothing for extended periods of time. As a Christian discipline, its understood as a way to separate yourself from the busyness and noisiness of this world. It is to be quietly still in God's presence, and through this quiet stillness, to actually be open to God's voice and presence. The world is a busy place, and we love the noise and activity. Have we considered the effect of that noise and activity on our ability to hear from, and respond to God?

Monks in ages past would literally flee society: literal solitude. Solitude will look different for us in our modern age, but the glaring importance of it remains.

A book I've currently been reading struck me as a moving reminder as to why we must continually seek God in the stillness of our hearts:

For inner silence depends on a continual seeking, a continual crying in the night, a repeated bending over the abyss. If we cling to a silence we think we have found forever, we stop seeking God and the silence goes dead within us. A silence in which He is no longer sought ceases to speak to us of Him. A silence from which He does not seem to be absent, dangerously threatens His continued presence. For He is found when He is sought and when He is no longer sought He escapes us. He is heard only when we hope to hear Him, and if, thinking our hope to be fulfilled, we cease to listen, He ceases to speak, His silence ceases to be vivid and becomes dead, even though we recharge it with the echo of our own emotional noise.

Thomas Merton
Thoughts in Solitude

The Christian faith is about a relationship, may we be ever attentive and ever vigilant.

See my books on solitude

Click to continue reading...

Where I begin

Its sort of like being beat up. Well sort of anyway. You feel a bit spacey, and there's some difficulty in focusing that can be accompanied by head throbbing. Not to mention the temperamental effects including impaired patience, mild unhappiness, loss of judgement, and just feeling plain drained. Its not a great state to be in. This is the world of sleep deprivation. Its a good reminder to know that sleep deprivation is used in torture. Suddenly the stupidity of self inflicted sleep deprivation grows in magnitude. There's something to be learned here...

Reflecting on this has reminded me of the clear depravity and brokenness of man. I constantly mess things up. I rarely know what's best for me, and even when I do, I have an uncanny history of choosing otherwise (sleep deprivation). This goes across the board though, don't forget that we're a species that lets 40,000 children starve every day, kills millions in wars, and causes countless broken relationships and families.

This is where life's biggest questions and conflicts begin: understanding there is something very wrong with us. This is why my faith (Christianity) is so mind-blowingly relevant to me. It meets me where I am: one who is hopelessly depraved and broken. Our attitude upon recognizing this should be one of humility. Its very easy for Christians (well anyone) to become proud and cocky. I think this is only possible when we forget our place. We are not in a place of strength of power, but of weakness and need. This is the most fundamental of truths in what it means to be a Christian. For it was in that place of weakness and need that God met us, it is where God saved us. Our humble recognition of that is where we need to begin, day after day.

In the economy of mercy
I am a poor and begging man
In the currency of grace
Is where my song begins (Economy of Mercy - Switchfoot)

Click to continue reading...

Faith and Culture

For this Friday I have been planning a movie night for Together Under Grace (TUG), the university/career fellowship at Chinese Alliance Church. I had recently seen a movie that really impacted me called Changing Lanes. I felt it would be great to show, but had some hesitations. Some Christians are definitely sensitive to things like crudge language, violence and that sort of stuff in movies. The question arose - what sort of movie should be shown at church?

This drives to much deeper issues that I've been thinking about - how should Christians interact with culture? Should we shy away from things that some Christians deem as offensive?

Then the deeper issues get into what is art/music and what is it good for. Consider a movie, which is offensive to some, but helps the viewer grow or think in a new way. Is this worthwhile to watch?

I tend to be more liberal when it comes to these issues. I'm glad someone made Saving Private Ryan, showing some of the violence and horror of WWII. Mostly because I think the film did a good job of showing the human stories, and that really impacted me. I don't know, some movies like 8mm, which delves into pornographic sex and severe violence - well I didn't find that very beneficial at all (I recall viewers walking out on the movie in the theatre).

I think we need need to be on the forefront of engaging and influencing culture. This can't happen without interacting with modern culture, and rubbing shoulders with the world. However, this should never be at the expense of our personal devotion to God, nor the cost of causing our brother to stumble.

Any thoughts?

Click to continue reading...

Pure and Simple

There's a reason I like endurance sports like running or cycling - the simplicity and purity of the aim. I can momentarily leave the complications of my life and pour all of myself into this one thing. Its tiring, there's times when you want to quit - but there's unfettered freedom in willing one thing.

Danish philosopher/theologian Søren Kierkegaard wrote a book called "Purity of Heart Is to Will One Thing." I so easily complicate my spiritual life into a list of a thousand things to do and a thousand things to learn. Motives begin to convolute and often corrupt. I have been reminded by God - that as a Christian I am to will one thing: to know and love God more.

I think when I learn to view all the aspects and areas of my life I can enjoy that same freedom of pouring all of oneself into biking 40km for example. The freedom of living for a single aim, indeed, purity of heart is to will one thing.

The full text is available online here [religion-online.org]

Click to continue reading...

On Accomplishment

A great excerpt from a book I'm currently reading that I think is worth sharing. Its talks about different phases of leadership development, but you don't need to know the phases to grasp the core of what Clinton is saying here:

The amazing thing is that during Phases I, II and III God is primarily working in the leader (not through him or her). Though there may be fruitfulness in ministry, the major work is that which God is doing to and in the leader, not through him or her. Most emerging leaders don't recognize this. They evaluate productivity, activites, fruitfulness, etc. But God is quietly, often in unusual ways, trying to get the leader to see that one ministers out of what one is. God is concerned with what we are. We want to learn a thousand things because there is so much to learn and do. But he will teach us one thing, perhaps in a thousand ways: "I am forming Christ in you." It is this that will give power to your ministry.

Click to continue reading...

Pursue your goals

A human being's highest achievement is
to let God be able to help him.

(Søren Kierkegaard)

Click to continue reading...

Food for thought

Today's email from Christian Quotation of the Day was:

On the one hand, in matters of the spirit, nothing fails like success. On the other hand, in matters of the spirit, nothing succeeds like failure.
Os Guinness (b.1941), Dining with the Devil: the Megachurch Movement Flirts with Modernity [1993], p.89

Worth thinking about...

Click to continue reading...

To think about it...

Wandering through the library here at the Schloss you come across all sorts of interesting books (this one happened to be signed by author and originally gifted to one of our OT profs here), randomly picked one up and came across this quote:

A human being's highest achievement is to let God be able to help him.
-Søren Kierkegaard

Yeah I really like it. I tend to fall into a mindset of thinking I have to do this and this, I need to change myself in this and this way, etc. When really after one becomes a Christian, the highest achievement may be making ourself available for God's help. This may include not having a hard heart, willingness to change, openness to God's sovereignty, etc.

Really interesting wording though, "let God be able". "Let" to me means some level of consent. Now "be able" means to suggest that we have some say in what God can do in us. Consider in Mark 6 (link), it is that our amount of faith can limit what God can do in our lives.

Consider the Isrealites during the exodus and the quote rings even more true. What did the Isrealites need to do? Part the Red sea themselves? Make their own manna? No - they needed to let God be able to help them, and to this end they often failed.

I hope I aim for the highest achievement

Click to continue reading...

Imagine

A quote that has always impacted me is:

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

We all find ourselves in different circumstances, and being human we believe certain things are possible and certain things aren't, given our circumstances. Herein lies the power of imagination. For God, what is impossible? So why is it that we only perceive reality with such limitations?

Imagination

noun 1. The faculty or action of forming ideas or images in the mind. 2. The ability of the mind to be creative or resourceful. (Oxford Compact)

We've been given the gift of imagination - the ability to conceive of a reality unlike our own. There are those dreamers and visionaries who are able to imagine great things that could be - and even sometimes those things once imagined come true.

I still struggle with understanding how much stock we should put into the things we can imagine. The struggle being:
a) If humans are sinful, then our imagination are sinful as well. We consider that the human heart is deceitful - thus we should be very cautious in our imaginings?
b) If God has redeemed us and given us a new heart and Spirit - well then perhaps its about time we started really exploring our imagination. In Genesis 2:19-20(link) we are seen that part of God's job was to use his own creativity and to name the animals - that we were included as part of God's creating process (throughout the Bible we see that God was keen on doing things, and then naming them). So if we really submit ourselves and give our imagination over to God - it may be our strongest ally.

Lately I've been leaning towards b) more. Been reading up on some G.K. Chesterton (this book) who's a Christian author, musician, etc you name it. He is a strong supporter of using our imagination, and the important of stories and fantasy.

I get a feeling that modern Christianity seems to suppress imagination, or is at least quite wary of dreaming/fantasy. I'm inclined to think that creativity cannot exist without imagination. I'm also inclined to think we were created to reflect God's creativity - hence why humans pursue arts/music/other types of expression really.

Hm just thinking of this now - if our perception of the world is very limited, then how else would God expand our perception other than through expanding our imagination? So what I mean is suppose you observe some situation - isn't our perception affected by our belief in God, what God can do, what we can do, what hope is there, etc etc? Isn't this some sort of spiritual vision/imagination?

Maybe the great visionaries of the past and present simply imagined more...

Click to continue reading...

Choice

Lately I've been thinking about choices a lot... the power of them... and also the privilege of them. Its an area of controversy I admit, I don't pretend I have all the answers... but let me intro this a bit:

I often hear people attribute circumstances, situations, relationships and all sorts of things to God. As a Christian myself - I have a firm belief that God exists and is an active part of our world. The question surrounding the controversy then is - how active is God's will versus our own choice?

The extreme positions on either side are both unbiblical:
1. We are simply God's puppets (1 Chron 21:10 for one example)

2. We are the sole creators of our fate (Prov 19:20)

I think at times I've erred by drifting towards either above positions... which leads me to problems:
1. If I'm a puppet, then I can absolve myself of any and all responsibility. God had arranged it that way... God did this... hence sayings like "she must be the one"... haha.

2. If I'm the sole creator of my fate - well then I don't have faith to look for God's work in the world - I only see a web of human choices. Human choices are ultimately sinful too - so this view doesn't allow room for God's redemption in our world.

But there are strengths and things to be said for these two positions too:
1. Bono said "The more you know, the less you believe". Jesus also tells us that a childlike faith is important. Perhaps we need to attribute more things to God - yes we make choices but God is orchestrating all of them in the beautiful symphony of His universe...

2. There positions strikes me as realistic and truthful, but probably because it suits my temperment. I think we should have a healthy perspective of what our choices are, and their effects. I really like the quote: "Watch your thoughts; they become your words. Watch your words; they become your actions. Watch your actions; they become your habits. Watch your habits; they become your character. Watch your character for it will become your destiny." We do a lot of things and make a lot of choices without knowing it, we should know that we reap the results of those decisions, although God can and often does redeem them in some way.

Ah to find balance...

On a more personal note, I have but 17 days left before I leave for Austria. Its been a ride... part of me feels like I've only come back home (got back Sept 22) and I'm already leaving again. I'm off to www.schlossmittersill.org. I'll be doing computer/music stuff while hopefully auditing some courses. I'm quite excited, but also sad to be leaving family and friends... my home. I guess I made a choice... or did I? :P

Click to continue reading...

I don't know

To err is human, to moo, bovine.

I have often wondered: as humans, should we ever be surprised to find that we're wrong or have committed some fault of some sort? It would seem doing wrong, or being imperfect (what Christians would call "sin") pervades everything we do. Whether a simple miscalculation when adding numbers, to hurting someone close to me - it seems my very nature to do so.

One would think the resulting attitude would then be of humility. In arguments or disputes we should be unsurprised and quite expecting to find ourselves with at least some fault.

My experience (and I would be as bold to suggest others' experiences as well) is quite different. I tend to assume I am right, and it is others that are at fault. On a deeper level there is insecurity - its not that I'm unaware of my faults and proclivity to do wrong... perhaps in the resultant shame a conflict emerges. I want anything but that shame, so I'll try to become perfect, to always be right - anything to avoid facing the brokenness and sinfulness of myself.

Maybe salvation has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself
Where you gonna go... salvation is here

-Dare You to Move by Switchfoot

I've often gone in search for adventure and battle... I do not need to look far though. Trying to learn this - what does it mean to see myself truely, to accept who I am, and to pour that before my Maker?

Click to continue reading...

Life Together

Currently Reading Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer



My job actually has resparked my interest to be reading more, and when things are quiet I can get in a few chapters everyday which is nice. I had read Bonhoeffer's Cost of Discipleship (Link) and am finding Life Together to be an amazing book. Its about Christian community - what it really means to have fellowship and to live together as the body of Christ.

The book is incredibly packed. I've read the 20 page first section a couple times, and I feel that I have to reread it some more to really digest what Bonhoeffer is saying. I feel that in 20 pages he so clearly identifies our misconceptions about fellowship. I've been extremely challenged by it. I've been meaning to read more Bonhoeffer, but what really pushed me was noticing that Schloss Mittersill specifically listed the book as being influential in shaping how they do community life.

The accolades are impressive, Richard Foster, author of the staple The Celebration of Discipline (a fine book also) wrote this high praise: "Most books can be skimmed quickly; some deserve careful reading; a precious few should be devoured and digested. Life Together... belongs to the third category."

I have been debating what snippet of the book I ought to share with you all... perhaps the one on the forefront of my mind is Bonhoeffer distinguishing between human love and spiritual love:

Human love is directed to the other person for his own sake, spiritual love loves him for Christ's sake. Therefore, human love seeks direct contact with the other person; it loves him not as a free person but as one whom it binds to itself. It wants to gain, to capture by every means; it uses force. It desires to be irresistible, to rule... Human love makes itself an end in itself. It creates of itself an end, an idol which it worships, to which it must subject everything. It nurses and cultivates an ideal, it loves itself, and nothing else in the world. Spiritual love, however, comes from Jesus Christ

Click to continue reading...

The unglorious trenches that must be held

Yesterday night I was tempted to buy Band of Brothers, a miniseries based on WWII stories of the famous airborne regiment Easy Company. Theres something about war stories thats so appealing - perhaps its the adventure, the glory, the chance to test and see what you're really made of.

Aye what a beautiful letdown it is. Its funny how that works out - especially as Christians we want to do great things. The beautiful letdown is when we are faced with a difficult struggle - one that is not glorious nor adventurous. It is painful, slow, filled with drudgery - the type of battle that is infinitely easier to avoid and ignore...

Perhaps blogs are meant to vent... I don't know. Maybe I'm the type of person who almost has to wear his heart on a sleeve. Alas another lot has fallen to me, no plans to get into the specific details here. Theres a mix of feelings - why me?. If it is for the greater good (which I do believe it to be), then this is selfish response to be sure. So I tremble - will I be the man?

I'm learning that the battle is not won on the spotlight of this world. It is these unglorious trenches - when everything in you wants to quit or run away and hide. No one would see, no would know. One episode of Band of Brothers a soldier shares his shameful confession. That on D-Day when they stormed the beach, he got seperated from his platoon, and ended up in a hole well concealed. He confesses that he never tried to find his group, that during all the battle he hid. No one knew, no one had to know. But he makes his confession, and from there he takes up his responsibility, his calling, and his purpose and fights from then on - wow.

Chambers words echo and haunt once more: "It is ingrained in us that we have to do exceptional things for God—but we do not. We have to be exceptional in the ordinary things of life." O that we would stand by the grace and strength of God in our unglorious trenches and fight the battles that fall to each of us.

Edit - Oh my I've glanced over my last few posts... far too serious, introspective, meh ai yah. OK some humour to lighten to mood. Although stay tuned, I think my next topic will try to address - why is it so easy and common for people to share relatively intimated and personal reflections on blogs anyway???

Some good times working at Convergys (all true):

Me: Thank you for calling Comcast. My name is allan, can I please have the phone number on your account starting with area code?
Some guy: *starts dialing*
Me: Uh.. could you just tell me please?
-
Me: Ok, now that we did that could we try opening up a web browser and lets see if you can get online.
Lady: Heck no! I only know how to turn this thing on
Me: *presses mute button and groans*
-
Cool NYer: Yeah man I feel ya
Me: Uh.. haha (considers saying "ya I feel it too brotha, but wisely doesn't)
-
Me: Ok could you turn off the computer please?
Lady: *presses button on the monitor* Ok theres nothing on my screen now
-
Lady: So why are they called cookies anyway?
Me: you know what? I have no idea... no one's ever asked me that before (and I still don't know!

Click to continue reading...

A sober view

Last Friday Terry gave a talk at youth group, somehow age came up and he said something along these lines: the older you get, the easier it is to rationalize yourself. Which is pretty scary, when I consider how easy it is already to convince myself that I'm right, and what I want is right, and that pretty much everyone else is wrong.. lol. Pride runs deep, it will do all it can to try to glorify the self and put itself above everyone else.

For the kingdom come, kingdom come
Your kingdom come
Won't you let me down, yeah
Let my foolish pride forever let me down
   -Beautiful Letdown by Switchfoot

I think theres a part of all of us that wants to be great. Whether in the eyes of certain people, others, what we think God's eyes see, our own eyes... hmm. We want to be special, recognized, glorified. I want to share a teaching by Oswald Chambers again, its a toughie but a goodie: It is ingrained in us that we have to do exceptional things for God—but we do not. We have to be exceptional in the ordinary things of life, and holy on the ordinary streets, among ordinary people—and this is not learned in five minutes. (Link).

Teach us to walk the humble path...

Click to continue reading...

Destitute...

Excerpt from today's My Utmost for His Highest devotional (Link)

We have to realize that we cannot earn or win anything from God; we must either receive it as a gift or do without it. The greatest blessing spiritually is the knowledge that we are destitute, until we get there Our Lord is powerless. He can do nothing for us if we think we are sufficient of ourselves; we have to enter His Kingdom through the door of destitution.

That man writes with such succinct clarity its disturbing... lol. Humble pie anybody?

Click to continue reading...

Go to your cell...

Getting quite excited as I'm diving into more reading/meditation on the topics of solitude and silence. Check out this excerpt from Bill Hybel's Too Busy Not To Pray:

You can't become an authentic Christian on a diet of constant activity, even if the activity is all church related. Ministry, Christian rock concerts, weekend conferences, church committee meetings - these all may be valuable, but they are not your main source of strength. Strength comes out of solitude... I'll repeat what I said... the archenemy of spiritual authenticity is business

Starting to get on the ball with planning and preperation for the Fallow Earth service. You know what? I've always wanted to write... but never really had a topic that really grabbed me. Well sometimes I did have topics but was too lazy (I'll mention this in a minute).

Anyway currently I have the passion to write some type of devotion book, I guess snippets of what I've been discovering on my journey with solitude or silence. Perhaps the title would be: Solitude - Meditations on a Closer Walk with God. This might end up just being a byproduct of my prepping for Fallow Earth which is leading me to hunt through several books on the topic.

The other thing I had wanted to write on I thought was a neat idea, but I'm already too old for it. (yup... at 23). The concept of the book would be a series of letters of dialogue between a 18 year old youth, and a parent. Only both letters would be written by myself.. firstly as a 18 year old living at home with parents, then as a parent with a 18 year old child (yes I know.. assuming I get married and have kids and the world doens't end, etc etc). I thought it'd be a neat attempt to help bridge the gap. Truth is, when I'm in my fifties, I WILL forget what it was like to be 18. Maybe theres a lot to be said for just writing ideas and things out. Hmm is 23 too late?

Click to continue reading...